The 7 Worst Things Said on First Date

You have found a new friend and you are keen to start a good relationship. You manage to secure their contact and you are out on a date. To ensure the first date goes well, it is good to avoid the 7 killers that may end a good relationship on your first date.

Rule 1: Do not compare with your ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend

No one likes to be compared in any way. Do not compare your new friend with any celebrity or worst your ex. You are just ready to spoil the day if you do so. If you are asked to comment say on the dress code, do it objectively on how he or she can be improved further such as “You look nicer in red top or a blue tie”. Such comments are harmless and it builds the relationship to be stronger. Statement such as “My ex also likes to dress in this way” is enough to spoil the mood.

Rule 2: Do not compliment your partner physical looks

Women are very sensitive if guys start saying they have flabby arms or clumsy legs. Guys do not feel good if they are being commented by women of having body odor or being stingy. Instead of putting hard truth to them, do it tactfully. For women with flabby arms, guys may suggest them wearing long sleeve to look elegant, or going for yoga class to stay healthy. For Guys with body odor, buy him his favorite perfume brand to stay sexy.  

Rule 3: Don’t over compliment your partner

Praising other is good but overdo it shows a lack of sincerity. If a guy keeps praising his partner attractive and sexy with his eye glued to her low cut top, it makes her more uncomfortable. A general statement such as “You look good today” with sincerity is good enough to make someone day. Try to avoid using exaggerated word like “You look young like a 12 years old girl.” If your partner has no sense of humor, she may reply, “Are you saying, I am childish?” It will soon start an argument.

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Rule 4: Don’t complain about work or your boss

It is challenging to find common topic on the first date. Apart from self introduction, it is natural to start talking about work and the displeasure on your nasty boss or colleagues. It is recommended not to dwell too deep in your work SOP or your boss weakness on the first conversation. Even if you have some unhappiness in your work, bring it up on subsequent dates when you are more comfortable with your partner. You do not want your partner to see you as a complaint King or Queen with no tolerance or patience at all.

Rule 5: It is all right to disagree on topic

You may have some topics which you disagree with. It is okay to air your views without being too defensive. Rather, you should avoid agreeing everything you will disagree otherwise. This will give your partner a wrong impression. It does not carry well on all subsequent dates. If you are not comfortable with certain remarks, state it in a neutral way such as, “You have your point but I think otherwise.” As long you are not aggressive in your views, your partner can understand.

Rule 6: Do not comment what your partner eats

Everyone has their own preference of food. Never comment anything bad on what they eat. If you partner likes to eat oily food and you are the health conscious type, respect what they eat. Statements like “This is so fattening.” “You are going to put on more weight if you eat this” or “This is so unhealthy …” do put your partner off and to end the date early. You can change their diet when you get to know them better, but definitely not on your first date.

Rule 7: Do not interrogate your partner

This is the worst part of all. If your partner is silent and you start a conversation by saying, “What are you thinking NOW?” it will sound provocative and authoritative. Always start with an open ended question to keep the conversation going. Close end question like ‘Do you take seafood?” usually end the conversation short. Do not use too many ‘Why’s in the conversation. This is a new date. You are not inviting a suspect to a police station for interrogation and investigation.

 Have fun networking.